Sometimes what we really want to do is let go.
Let go of that pain.
Let go of that pattern.
Let go of the wall that is in the way.
And, sometimes, what we really have to do hold it close.
Even that pain.
Even that pattern.
Even that thing we want to be done with so damn much.
Sometimes, what we have to embrace it.
We have to stop pushing it away.
Stop trying to separate our Selves from it. Stop trying to separate our Self.
And I want to be beyond clear here, none of this is saying to let your Self hurt.
None of this is saying to hold abuse or abuser closer.
None of this saying to not walk away.
What I am saying is that we cannot walk away from our Selves.
We cannot walk away from that voice inside that spews venom.
Or the part that weeps and aches and tries to fill itSelf up in all the ways that it can.
We can not walk away from the parts we hate and the parts that hate.
The path to healing is rarely, if ever, about abandoning your Self.
And if you try to shame your Self into change.
If you try to ignore the voices that rage.
If you try to run from the parts that hold the fire.
You are trying to abandon you Self.
And if you will find your Self stuck.
We have to let those parts and pieces of our being. know that even though they hurt...even though they have hurt us...we see them.
We love them.
We have to re-member them to the whole that is our Truth.
We have to let them know that the behaviors will change.
But the part of us that has held on...the part of us that has tried in its own way to protect us...needs to be shown the way home.